No Damn Way

best day ever.
god it was good.

Wink Wink

This weekend was perfect! minus being sick, uck. Jimmy got his lisense ;) i think friday was spent at angelas like always. i went home early and slept early too. i didn't feel very good. Saturday i went to avietas with jimmy and laina and we watched Sweeny todd (sp?) it was pretty good i guess. gory, but interesting. we cheeled there the whole day and i went home early again because im lame and dont have a car like everyone else :[[ ghetto...anyways, Sunday Jim picked me up and we drove to Sunrise n around there for food. We looked around the Market of Choice and found a cool new place to buy candy :pp ahaha. so we stocked up and then went to lainas in coburg. we made lots n lots of snow cones, played Egyptian rat race, and went to the park. i looove coburg. havnt been there since summer i think when me n Michael were close :/ anywho, we ate dinner then watched tv. like at 8:30 we went back to angelas. i was planning on leaving with jim like 12 the latest, but hr after hr it wasnt gunna happen. we eneded up crashing there. they all watched a couple movies and went out for food, but i just stayed there with kyle. perfect night :) at like 3 he went home and me ang n jim stayed up a lil longer and then totaly died. i came home like at 11 this morning and then did lots n lots of hw until like an hr ago. it was gay. but my weekend was good

:)

This Is For Real

i love kyle james dillon :) he is my sweetheart and i love everything about him. he's my baby. my love. my everything. its almost two months hun :] you make me so happy and u are the most amazing thing in my life. i want to be with you every second. don't doubt what i feel for you...cuz what we have is so strong. sometimes i forget what you are to me, but one look in your eyes and im back to being head over heals for the most amazing guy in the world. i want to grow with you, i want to experience life in your arms. i want to get thru the tough stuff, i want to learn to love the flaws. its funny thinking about who we used to be, and who we are now. life is so good with you

love you :]

Still a place for you

right here.

there always has.
there always is.
there always will.

last night

all i did was cry

Scared :(

Right as fourth got out my sister texted me and said her and my brother were at the hospital with with my mom. it was like a sudden stab..it didn't really sink in for the first ten minutes..but i keyed in the fact that my mom said she couldn't use her hand yesterday cuz it was numb, its didn't really mean anything till then. it was so telepathic tho cuz right when i told jimmy she was in the hospital he was like "wait, was her left arm hurting??" and i was like yeah her arm was hurting yesterday but idk which arm and it was just incredibly weird that it was the first thing that came to his mind...anyways he said he'd take me to the hospital but i didnt really want him to so i just went to market of choice with him and angela trying to figure out what i was going to do..instead i kind of just sat there crying because i was scared of what was happening..all i knew was that she was there, and that her whole right side was numb. it scared me half to death cuz it had to be pretty bad if she was at the hospital...my dad doesnt believe in doctors...i got a hold of my aunt and they said they were at Sacred Heart so me and angela got a ride over there. it lightened my mood too see my mom smile when i walked in but they told me all that was up and it made me so sad :( she had a stroke yesterday and that was the problem with her arm..but no one knew..and since she waited till today to go to the hospital, which was mind blowing that she actualy went, it made things worse...if she had waited till tomorrow, which she wanted to do today, she might had never been able to walk again. now that is the scariest thing i have ever had to hear. good thing my brother and sister took her...i dont know what i'd do if that really happened...the doctor said she needs to watch what she eats cuz she has diabetes and keep taking the medicne she stopped using cuz of the price...all of this just sucks because the stuff that should be done cant becuase we don't have the money. and thats just awesome...

i cant keep my eyes from watering :( i jcant stop crying...my grandparents just left, and it was so hard to keep a smile on.

ugh..i have so much to do tonight..oh and thanks angela for being there for me..its nice that atleast someone cared..


God, jsut one wish, make my mom better...thats all i want..

Good Start

So pretty much, May started off wonderfully :) it has been sunny the past week and maybe not my whole weekend, but at least part of it was just good. Saturday i spent with jimmy, laina, n kyle and it was pretty nice. that night nick invited me over so i stayed the night with him n Greg. we didn't fall asleep till 1, n then woke up at eight. srsly my record time n getting ready :pp we left at like 830 n went to breakfast. after, we walked to ebf. it brought a lot of old memories back to me. i liked it a lot. i hope we can do that again. after church i went to angelas and from then on my day was incredibly stressful. blehhh. that night sucked too, spent it all doing my Spanish project.

this week is ok...not lots to do...im excited for summer :]]