A New Year

Finally right? 07 was probably one of the most complicated years. I decided to make a blog of my year..basically just something that i can look back on. But first, this is a summary of the past year..

Beginning of 07 i had just re started a relationship i'd broke off a little bit before. It felt like a good time to get back in the swing..but really, i was just confused. And if feel bad for choosing to do what i did because it only hurt someone i really cared about..or at least someone who once meant so much to me. We had been dating about 7 months before and i guess i felt that i couldn't give up. but i just should have.

I ended up liking one of my best friends, and so im not sure what made me want to still try with a relationship that hadn't been what i wanted it to be for a while. The feelings really just died, and i was probably just trying to save it..it didn't work. Truth? You don't get over someone till someone else comes along, and thats what happened. oh boy, did it ever. i fell head over heals. no exaggerations.

That new relationship didn't last as long as i was hoping though. it actually didn't last long at all. and that was probably the most heart breaking moments i have encountered. It ended up just ruining a friendship with someone i loved so much. if i had to describe the last year, this is the reason why it was so...not great. it was cuz i was living with the thought in my mind that he was the only one for me..that no one else could make me feel the way he did, and that feeling stayed with me up until about the time school started back up..but even just a little bit after.

But I'm happy now to say that i love where me and him are right now. We're back to being best friends and he is just as amazing as i remember. I love talking to him and being with him, he makes me laugh and i really love that. i know this is cliche, but he has shaped me into who i am today..with the help of some others. i hope he knows he means alot to me.

it felt like forever before those feelings for that kid left me but hey, it happened...i thank 'him' for doing that for me. yea yea i found a guy to..well, like. (though i am very doubtful that he would ever feel what i feel back) there were many guys who i seemed to have "liked" but nothing extraordinarily big...none of them were anything i wanted to pursue...but then this boy came along...but i wont go into detail..sorry ;)

Oh, i forgot to mention that i lost a lot of people back in the year. how depressing right? Two of my very best friends actually..one, whom I'd been friends with since back in elementary. it was really stressful and dramatic but things changed. he changed. but I'm not here to tell you a sob story..I'll just keep it at this...him and i were close, then he started getting into other things and we have completely become different people. but I'm okay with it..i don't think about it much.

Anyways, Sophomore year is a very 'new' thing to me. School is harder, people have changed dramatically, and well..its just not all that great. but I'm not here to complain either, a lot of wonderful things happened. I've learned a lot from the people and things around me. All the hurt has made me much stronger...but im not gunna go all deep on ya.

ohoh BUT i can't forget that i have also met some really wonderful people that are now what i call my best friends :) they are sososo wonderful and i really feel blessed to have them. i hope they know that i love them dearly.

The new year didn't happen as i thought it would. I pictured well...a picture perfect beginning. But it wasn't like that. it was just another ordinary night spent with the people i love. and i can't say that this year has been anything like I'd hoped it would be..so far all I've been feelings is anxious and wanting something new..but you know what? I'm okay with waiting. nothing good comes easy..and I'm looking for something great :)

On another note, i've made a few resolutions.
1) Read the bible.
2) Be a better person. real original right?
3) Appreciate the people and things i have a little more. They deserve it.

ohoh and get my license.. along with a car! oh life shall be good!